Friday, May 28, 2010

"Wow, three boys!"

It seems like everywhere we go, people comment about the fact that we have three boys.

"Wow, three boys! You must be busy."

"Three boys? Are you going to try for a girl?"

"What, no girls?"

These types of statements have given me the best opportunities to tell people about my only daughter.

Just today, I talked about Felicity to three different people: the gal at Burger King who commented to us as we were leaving, the lady who cut my hair, and a woman at the bank. I even pulled out a photo album I carry around with me to show one of them her NILMDTS pictures.

I'm proud of my daughter. I want people to see her pictures. I want people to know about stillbirth and to have a face to put with it. I want her short life to have meaning.

I don't know what kind of impact I'm having when I share with these people, but talking about Felicity helps me. Each time it gets a little easier. And when I tell people I have a daughter in Heaven and they see a smile on my face, I hope that they wonder why I'm able to smile about it. Sometimes they even ask or comment about how hard it is and I'm able to share a little more.

Felicity may not be with us, but she continues to have a legacy.


Bethany said...

Oh, Rachel. It is brave and good and generous of you to share Felicity with others.
With love,

Tonya said...

*Smile* The same thing has happened recently to me in regards to having another boy. People see me with my girls, ask what I'm having, and when I tell them a boy, they say, "Oh, I bet you're excited" or something to that extent. I never deny my Grady, so it is an opportunity to share about him and let people know that we already have a little boy in heaven. As painful as it still is, it does make my heart smile to talk about him. Thanks for sharing. Have a great holiday weekend!


Anonymous said...

AMEN!!! Our precious children have a legacy! Their life on earth may have been brief but their impact is still being felt. I have a friend who's daughter accepted Christ after Hannah was born. The reality of Heaven was made more real for her by seeing a little one go there. Hannah's older siblings have a much more real picture of Heaven because their beloved sister lives there. I have been made more into His image through her beautiful life.
May we remember all our sweet blessings! Children, all children, are indeed a gift from the Lord!!


Heidi said...

If its any consolation, we get those comments too...even with the girl. Only it goes more like, "Oh you finally got your girl! Were you hoping for a girl?" Sometimes I want to say "No ***, actually I just wanted a living breathing baby." Of course, you know I don't say it...but sometimes I think it!

I also get, "Are you done having kids now that you finally have a girl?"

It is up to us to be that legacy, isn't it? To help correct those inaccurate assumptions!

Sara said...

Rachel, thanks for sharing that...I am sure that your smile has an impact on them when you share that... I am still not sure that I am smiling when I say it. It is all such a process huh? What beautiful children you have those 3 boys and that precious daughter:)

Is it any cooler up there than down here... my Wisconsin blood is saying his is too much:)

Ebe said...

Oh, I love talking about Owen too... and like Sara, I'm not sure I'm smiling when I talk about him in Heaven, but you're right- it is a beautiful, joyous thing. Thank you for sharing...