My name means "little lamb" and the verse that goes along with that is Isaiah 40:11
"He shall feed his flock like a shepherd; he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young."
As a child I wondered why this verse went with my name. Other than it being about lambs, it didn't really mean much to me. Now that I've live 30+ years of life, I cherish this verse. This verse became especially meaningful to me when my first husband decided he "wasn't happy" and didn't want to be married anymore. I was three months pregnant at the time after trying for over a year to get pregnant. And yet, God gently led me. He cared for me and provided for me, and my relationship with him was renewed in a powerful way.
I also find great peace and comfort knowing Felicity has been gathered into His arms and carried in His bosom. Despite my great desire to carry her in my arms, she is safely in the arms of the one who created her and knit her together in my womb; the ONE who knew the exact number of her days.
And now I find great comfort in this verse, because He again is "gently leading those that are with young." On Wednesday, we found out that I'm pregnant! Thank you Lord for this new life! We are thrilled and happy! We are also sad, knowing the frailty of life and that there on no guarantees that this baby will be healthy and whole. We trust God in all things. I know I will have to give Him my concerns and worries on a daily basis as we go through this pregnancy.
We are assuming this baby will be due right around Felicity's first birthday in heaven, so that brings another element of sadness into this bright picture. I feel like I'm experiencing a bizarre case of deja vu as we found out Felicity was on the way almost exactly a year ago. I go to the doctor on Monday and will then be scheduled for an ultrasound to date the pregnancy. (I never got my period back since Felicity's death and as Elijah was still nursing.)
You're probably wondering why I'm willing to share this pregnancy so soon with so many. Well, my greatest hope is that you will lift us up in prayer as we begin this journey after loss, especially in these next few weeks. I don't think I even need to say what we need prayer for, please pray as the spirit leads. I have felt so blessed during this grief journey by all your prayers and kind words. The Spirit of God is working through you!
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